W H E N A N X I ET Y EX P L O D E S
Anxiety can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be, and it does get easier to manage with the right tools.
We’ve compiled expert advice and resources we found this year while reporting “Generation Vexed”
and hope it will help you and your family on this journey.

DEAL WITH THE CRISIS

crisis intervention services, information and referrals

If your child threatens self-harm or is contemplating
suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Line:
1-800-273-TALK

National Alliance on Mental Illness
(NAMI) Helpline: 1-800-950-NAMI (6264)
Available Monday - Friday from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. ET 

In Utah, the University of Utah 24/7 crisis line:
1-801-587-3000

Crisis Text Line: Text HELLO to 741741 from
anywhere, anytime, about any type of crisis. A live,
trained crisis counselor will respond quickly

SET UP SUPPORT

TAKE CARE
OF YOURSELF

Check with your child’s pediatrician
or county mental health authority:
https://hope4utah.com/utah-mental-health-agencies/
Be prepared to discuss
the frequency, duration
and severity of the child’s
struggle. If a child is
having an off day or two,
but can eventually pull it
together, that’s different
from a normally calm child
who begins to explode or
withdraw for longer periods
of time.

HELPFUL RESOURCES
University of Utah’s “warmline”:
801-587-1055
For peer support with struggles short of a crisis,
available from 9 a.m. - 10 p.m.
American Psychiatric Association:
www.psychiatry.org
Patients and Families, Find a Psychiatrist
Boys Town National Hotline: 1-800-448-3000
Parents or teens, boys or girls, can talk with a Boys
Town counselor 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, for

Text
HELLO
to
741741

Consider confiding in trusted
friends about your family’s
struggle. A support network is crucial and may
also lead you to other
resources.

Accept that helping
an anxious child may
require significant mental, emotional and even
financial investment. Educate yourself, ask questions
and be your child’s advocate
without taking over or shielding
them from opportunities to stretch
and grow.

Recognize your child’s anxiety is no one’s fault, but
a medical condition that can be managed.
Get enough sleep, eat well, take time to do things
that you enjoy and that provide a break from the
stressful situation at home.

 A N X I ET Y T O O L K I T

Learn to lessen stress with tools the experts use and recommend:
Box breathing

Do these steps for four seconds
apiece. Breathe in. Hold. Breathe
out. Hold. Pay attention as you do it
and feel yourself calm down.

Name the emotion

Identifying a stressful emotion can
decrease its intensity by nearly half.
Ask a child having an outburst to
name what he’s feeling — “Anger”
“Sadness” “Fear” — and assign an
intensity number, 1-10. It not only short-circuits
the emotion, but forces the brain to think logically,
shifting brain activity to the executive function,
which imaging suggests goes dark when the
amygdala is lit by emotion and anxiety.

Touch your heart

Listen to your heartbeat for a
few seconds to calm down
or lower stress.

Story in your head

When you speak your worries
aloud, it’s easier to see your panicked
scenario as unlikely. Consider a boy
waiting for a girl to respond to his
prom invitation. His brain churns: She’s
giggling right now with her friends, who are going
to ostracize him. Oh no. He’ll have no friends. He’ll
never get married. “It carries emotion far beyond
reality, but if you can speak it to yourself or a
trusted friend, you quickly realize that’s not the
way it’s going to be,” says Joe Newman of Life
Launch Centers.

Worry time

Set a limited but specific time to
worry. When something starts bugging
you during the day, acknowledge it and
tell yourself you’ll look at it during worry
time. Then put it in an imaginary box that you’ll
open then. Be specific: 10 p.m.

Emphasize exercise

Physical activity releases stress
while building confidence. It’s also a
good chance to make friends or
learn new skills.

Go to sleep

Everything is harder to deal with
when you’re tired. Nearly
everyone needs more sleep than
they get, especially teens. Get a
better night’s sleep by removing
technological distractions.

Eat well

Relying on sugar, caffeine, refined
carbs and empty calories can leave
you lightheaded and prone to
crashing, which can make anxiety
worse. Eating good food in a mindful way
can also be a chance to slow down and recalibrate.

Welcome fear

Make your home a place where
discomfort and fear are welcome, says
Utah therapist Jenny Howe. “Oh, this
is something you’re scared of?” she
says, “Great, let’s talk about it and do it.”

C o n t i n u e d o n t o p o f n e x t pag e

 A n x i e t y To o l K i t c o n t i n u e d

Be mindful
Pay attention to your breath and
scan your body with “loving
kindness” — a good way to recognize
“unpleasant emotions, aside from
avoiding them,” which “never reduces the stress,”
says Alexis V. Arczynski of the University of Utah
Campus Counseling Center. Instead, acknowledge
the feeling, either “swipe” it away or unpack it —
no judgment for feeling how you feel.

own heads. Talking candidly with a trusted friend
or family member can help lessen the feeling that
“no one understands.”

Unplug
While not all anxiety stems from or is
related to social media, anyone who’s
anxious may find that a break from
the curated world of Instagram and the
constant offerings of YouTube can be refreshing.

Talk it out
Anxiety and depression often trap
people — especially teens — in their

L E A R N M O R E A B O U T A N X I ET Y
A N D M EN TA L H E A LT H
BOOKS

For teens

For parents

“The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook for
Teens” by Jennifer Shannon

“When Panic Attacks” by David D. Burns
“The Self-Driven Child” by William
Stixrud and Ned Johnson
“Freedom from ObsessiveCompulsive Disorder”
by Jonathan Grayson
“The Triple Bind: Saving
Our Teenage Girls From
Today’s Pressures and
Conflicting Expectations”
by Stephen Hinshaw

“What To Do When You Worry Too Much”
by Dawn Huebner
“The Panic Workbook for Teens”
by Debra Kissen, Bari Goldman Cohen
and Kathi F. Abitbol
“The Anger Workbook for Teens” by
Raychelle Cassada Lohmann
“The Anxiety Workbook for Teens” by
Lisa M. Schab

“Doing School: How We Are
Creating a Generation of Stressed-Out,
Materialistic, and Miseducated Students”
by Denise Pope

“Duke’s Journey of Courage” by Tanya Lindquist

http://www.challengesuccess.org/resources/books/

“David and the Worry Beast: Helping Children
Cope with Anxiety” by Anne Marie Guanci

For kids
“Tiger-Tiger, Is It True?” by Byron Katie

 W H AT S C H O O L S C A N D O

Moving beyond grades, test scores and performance

S

tanford Senior Lecturer Denise Pope
co-founded Challenge Success 15
years ago after she saw too many
college students arrive at Stanford with
high GPAs but mentally fried, sleepdeprived and on medication for anxiety
and depression.
The program encourages primary and
secondary schools to reduce the pressure
on kids by adjusting schedules and
expectations — encouraging overall well-

being through later start times, projectbased learning, mindfulness practices,
changes in grading and parent buy-in.
The nonprofit has worked with over 450
schools across the country — though none in
Utah yet. Here’s what the Challenge Success’
SPACE framework looks like for the 501 K-8
students at The Alexander Dawson School
at Rainbow Mountain in Las Vegas, Nevada,
according to Roxanne Stansbury, assistant
head of school.

S P A C E
Students’ schedule
and use of time
• Teachers use an
online “conflict
calendar” to avoid
kids having tests
or big projects
due on the same
day in multiple
classes.
• A floating
schedule means
subjects rotate
times each day,
recognizing that
kids may learn
better at different
times of the day.

Project and
problem-based
learning
• All students
engage in handson learning and
exploration —
like how second
graders take care
of an organic
garden and plan a
farmers’ market,
then use the
proceeds to invest
in microbanking in
the country they’re
studying.

Alternative and
authentic assessment
• As part of the
project-based
learning, students
are graded on a
“key performance,”
rather than
just tests.

Climate
of care
• Students
learn socialemotional skills,
mindfulness,
meditation,
positive coping
strategies.
• Daily 20-minute
check-in gives
students time
to talk with an
adviser or ask
questions of
other teachers to
encourage selfadvocacy.

Education for the
whole community
• School officials
encourage parents
to prioritize sleep,
unstructured play
time and family time
over homework,
especially when
homework seems
to be taking an
excessively long
time.
• A student advisory
board decided to
plan the school’s
January open
house to teach their
parents about the
importance of sleep.